Chapter 19: Can't Stay Away

[Sierra’s POV]

School was a drag today. I spent the whole day reminding myself not to turn around so that I didn’t have to look at Jae Wook’s face.

“You’re going to get stiff neck by the end of the day,” Hee Chul whispered to me when he realized what I was doing.

“I don’t want to look at him. His expression is killing me,” I whispered back.

“What expression?” he said and turned to look.

“Don’t!” I hissed at him and grabbed him by the shirt so that he wouldn’t turn.

“He’s not even looking at you,” Hee Chul smirked.

I took a quick peek and saw him staring intently at the textbook in front of him.

“He was, this morning…” I said.

“Well he isn’t now,” he said, but that didn’t put me at ease.

During lunch, instead of joining our group like he had been doing for the past week, he dragged Dong Hae off with him to a table far away from ours. Dong Hae looked pretty confused, but so did Sung Min and Shin Dong. I haven’t told them about the breakup yet. So they thought that we were having a fight or something.

“What’s going on?” Sung Min whispered to Hee Chul, thinking that I couldn’t hear him.

“Mind your own business,” Hee Chul said as he continued eating.

“Did they have a fight?” Shin Dong piped in.

“Ask Sierra,” Hee Chul said, loud enough for me to hear, and the 2 of them looked at me, willing me to put their curious minds to rest.

“I’ll tell you guys later,” I said. “I’m not in the mood today.”

As soon as the last bell rang, I packed up quickly and stood up, ready to bolt out of the classroom. In my hurry, I collided with Jae Wook; he was probably also thinking of the same thing.

Music: Loveholic – Leave Me

“Mian,” I mumbled, and quickly walked out ahead of him.

“Wait up,” Hee Chul called out and sprinted after me.

I walked as fast as I could until the school gates were in sight.

“You don’t have to run away from the poor guy,” Hee Chul said, trying to keep up with me.

“Han Kyung said he’d pick me up. I don’t want him to see me leaving with Han Kyung,” I said.

“Araso… araso…” he said and followed me quietly.

Hee Chul stood outside the school gates with me for a good half an hour. Han Kyung hadn’t shown up.

“Where’s lover boy?” Hee Chul asked.

“I don’t know,” I replied, and adjusted the straps of my backpack on my shoulders.

“Here…” Hee Chul said and took the backpack from me. “I’ll carry it,” he smiled.

“Thanks,” I said, and rubbed my tired shoulders.

“Why don’t you call him?” he asked.

“I don’t want to,” I said.

“You’re such a stubborn pig,” Hee Chul laughed. “Here you are, standing under the hot sun, waiting for the jerk, and yet you wouldn’t call him.”

“You know why…” I said, and exhaled sharply.

“Oh yea… that pride. Sierra Hwang should never have to call a guy for services. Men should beg to serve you,” he joked.

“You know this isn’t a good time to be lame…” I rolled my eyes at him.

“Ne… samonim…” he laughed.

“Where is he?” I muttered to myself as we continued to wait.

[Jae Wook’s POV]

Dong Hae and I were walking towards the school gates when suddenly he grabbed my arm and tugged me in another direction.

“What… Dong Hae… the school gate’s that way,” I said.

“Let’s take the side gate,” he said and continued to walk hurriedly.

He was being downright odd, so I decided to see if there was something he was pulling me away from. I turned my head, and saw Sierra and Hee Chul loitering at the gate. Shouldn’t she have gone home by now? I stopped walking, and just stood and watched as she and Hee Chul talked and paced about at the gates. Then I realized that she must be waiting for Han Kyung.

“Let’s go,” Dong Hae tugged at my arm.

I brushed Dong Hae off and started walking towards Sierra.

“Jae Wook… don’t do this,” he said as he followed me.

“Go home,” I said to him. “This is my business.”

“You’re going to get yourself killed,” he said.

I’d told Dong Hae the whole story while we were waiting in the classroom earlier.

“Mwo?” he practically screeched. “She dated Han Kyung? Are we talking about the same Han Kyung?”

“The one who punched me because of you,” I said.

“The god-son of the supreme jjang, Ahn Sung Ki?”

“One and the same,” I sighed.

“Dude… you could’ve died… for real,” he said, in a tone which could only be indentified as disbelief.

“What do you take me for? A dweeb?” I said. “I know I look and act like I’m the confused freshie. I only do that to be inconspicuous.”

“Inconspicuous?” Dong Hae snorted. “You date the queen-ka of the school within the first week and you think you’re being inconspicuous?”

“I planned to be, until I met Sierra, until I met you. You encouraged me,” I pointed out to him.

“Well… I didn’t know she had such a complicated background. I always thought that she was just being picky. I didn’t know that the reason she couldn’t date any guy for long was because of that psycho. I’m beginning to realise that Ee Teuk didn’t scare them off. Han Kyung must’ve been behind all of those failed relationships.”

“How many has she had?” I asked.

“Quite a few,” he contemplated. “They barely last a week, let alone a month.”

“So you’re saying me being dumped in the 2nd week was lucky.”

“Sort of,” he shrugged.

“I’m not letting go,” I said, and I turned to walk towards Sierra as I had initially planned.

Music: Buzz – 남자를 몰라 (You Don’t Know Men)

I strode towards Sierra and Hee Chul. As I approached, they looked up towards my direction. Hee Chul smiled a knowing smile, and Sierra tried to maintain the expressionless look she had been giving me the entire day.

“Can we talk?” I said as I stood in front of her.

“Umm… I’ll be just around the corner,” Hee Chul said and turned to walk away.

“Stay,” Sierra said as she reached out and grabbed him arm to pull him back.

“I need to talk to you, alone,” I emphasized.

“Hee Chul is practically family to me, he can hear whatever you have to say,” she said.

“Sierra, please…” I said.

“Talk to him,” Hee Chul said, and walked away before she could stop him again.

After Hee Chul walked off, she turned away from me, facing the road outside the school gates. It’s obvious that since I’ve not known her for long, I’m having a hard time reading her signals. As much as I’d like to believe that love made you more perceptive of the person you loved, it’s pretty much a myth.

“Sierra,” I said her name softly.

“I’ve said all I needed to,” she said to me. “What else have I not made clear to you?”

“You were very clear,” I said.

“Then why are you still here?” she demanded.

“To tell you that I’m not giving up,” I said.

She glared at me, and bit her lip gently, contemplating a suitable reply to me. Her final answer was a little unexpected.

“Jae Wook-ah… hajima…” she said softly.

“Wae hajima?” I asked her.

“I don’t want you to get hurt,” she said.

“I’m not afraid of getting hurt,” I said.

“What if you have to die for me?” she asked.

“I’m not going to die for you,” I said. “I will stay alive because I want to be with you.”

“It’s not going to work,” she said, shaking her head sadly.

“Sierra!” I pleaded as I grasped her shoulders with both my hands.

What did I have to do to make her see that this could work?

Just as I was about to say more, a black limo pulled up in front of the school gates. The passenger door swung open and out stepped Han Kyung, obviously fuming at the sight of the 2 of us standing together.

“Take your hands off her,” he said.

“No,” I said, and pulled her towards me, wrapping in arm around her.

“Let me go,” she said.

“You heard her,” Han Kyung said.

“No,” I replied.

“You’re really asking for it, aren’t you?” Han Kyung said.

“What are you gonna do? Kill me?” I mocked him.

“Let go of her,” he said.

“No,” I said.

I released her, only to grasp her arm in my hand, and I started running, dragging her along with me. I prayed hard before I did that. I prayed that she would run with me, and not pull me back and refuse to leave with me. My prayers were answered… she was running beside me, and I hoped that this meant that she was with me again.

Chapter 18: Said I Loved You, But I Lied...

I could only stand there and watch as Han Kyung kissed Sierra’s forehead affectionately and told her he’d be back to pick her up after school. He glared at me, as if warning me to stay away from her before he got into the car and drove off.

“Sierra?” I called her name, questioningly.

She turned to look at me, but she didn’t smile. There was no expression on her face. It was blank… but most of all… it was cold.

“We’re going to be late for class,” she said, and walked off without looking back.

Music: TVXQ – 하루달 (Harudal)

What did she mean? I was utterly bewildered. After all that we went through last night, she’d decided to get back with that thug. She hasn’t asked me for a breakup, but she’s not exactly holding my hands and telling me that she was with me either. What the hell is going on?

“Wait up,” I finally said, and ran up to her side. “What was that?” I asked her.

“What was what?” she said, as if the scene she’d set before me a minute ago hadn’t happened at all.

“Are you back together with him?” I asked her.

“What does it look like?” she said, coldly.

“Sierra… you said we’d stick together,” I reminded her.

“Situations change, life goes on,” she said.

“Not overnight!” I exclaimed.

She stopped walking and turned to face me.

“Jae Wook… it was fun while it lasted, but you’re obviously no match for Han Kyung. He’s rich and powerful, and you are… let’s say… close to nothing. You need to get your head on straight.”

“You think I don’t know that? I know I am nothing next to that rich thug… but at least I had your support. You promised we’d stick together and weather it out together,” I said.

“I have no power to support you. Even my family would have to bow to his. So let’s make this painless for all of us, shall we?” she said.

“I really can’t believe you’d do this,” I said. “I thought you had more integrity.”

“Integrity’s for those who have nothing else in life. I have a long future before me, and if surviving means having to be with him, I will survive,” she said.

She said those words with such conviction. She’d obviously become another person overnight. The girl I’d held, the girl I’d kissed last night… she was gone. She’d been replaced by the kind of girl I’d expected someone like her to be, a selfish and callous brat.

“I hope you’re happy,” I said simply, and walked off without looking back at her.

Last night, I was ready to lay down my life for her. Last night, we’d shared a bond that I thought was unbreakable. Last night, I gave my heart and soul to her… and today… she threw it all in my face.

[Sierra’s POV]

I watched as Jae Wook walked off. My heart was beating like crazy. I’d successfully driven him away. I lied, I put on my best poker face, and said the words I needed to drive him away.

“Mianhae…” I whispered, as he walked off.

I trailed behind him slowly. Watching his proud but defeated figure walk towards the building where our homeroom was. Halfway there, I was intercepted by Hee Chul. If he hadn’t found me then, I’d probably had run off to the bathroom to cry.

“Sierra,” he called out. “Why aren’t you walking with lover boy?”

“Shush…” I hissed at him, and he looked at me, at Jae Wook’s back, and then back at me with a look of confusion.

“Don’t tell me it’s over,” he said in a hushed tone.

“It’s over,” I said.

Music: TVXQ - Kissしたまま、さよなら

I walked towards a nearby bench and sat down. Hee Chul came and sat next to me.

“You know…” he said, “you can cry if you want to,” he smiled warmly.

“I don’t think tears would help now,” I said.

I looked down at the ground, staring at my shoes, trying to distract my eyes so that the tear ducts wouldn’t give in.

“Sierra…” he said and put a brotherly arm around my shoulder, “it’s alright. It’s just us. You can cry if you want to.”

“Stop it, Hee Chul,” I said. “I don’t want to cry.”

No sooner had I said it, the tears started pooling in my eyes, and a single tear found it’s way down my cheek. Hee Chul pulled me closer so that my head rested on his shoulder, and the tears just continued flowing as I cried silently.

We sat there for about half an hour, until I’d calmed down. Then Hee Chul started interrogating me.

“So? Are you telling or not?” he asked.

“You can’t tell anyone,” I said to him, and he nodded. “Not even Sung Min and Shin Dong,” I emphasized.

“Araso…” he said.

“I’m back with Han Kyung,” I said, and his eyes were about to pop out of their sockets.

“Back with Han Kyung?” he exclaimed. “I thought you didn’t like him.”

“He was threatening to kill Jae Wook. I had no choice.”

“Ah… so this is about Jae Wook,” he smiled.

“I can’t let Han Kyung go around killing guys for me.”

“Yea… even Ee Teuk isn’t that scary.”

“Ee Teuk is nothing, compared to Han Kyung,” I said.

“But you like Han Kyung, don’t you?” he said.

I never knew that Hee Chul was able to see through me. All this while, I thought that I’d put on a pretty good act when it came to my feelings for Han Kyung.

“What do you mean?” I said.

I had to try again, anyhow.

“I’ve noticed your reactions whenever he appeared,” he smiled. “You tried too hard to hate him.”

“It’s a long story,” I sighed.

“One that you won’t be telling me,” he said.

“Yep…”

“Oh well…” he laughed. “So what’s the plan now? Do we need to handle Jae Wook for you?”

“No… just let him be. Hopefully, he’ll get over it.”

“Get over you?” Hee Chul said. “That’s going to be some feat,” he laughed.

“You know…” I smiled. “Your flattery isn’t going to do anything for you at this point.”

“I know…” he laughed. “It’s just fun to see your expression when I say stuff like that.”

“Let’s get to class,” I said as I stood up.

When we walked into class, the teacher just looked up briefly, then continued teaching. They would never reprimand us for anything. As Hee Chul and I took our seats, I could feel Jae Wook’s gaze. I turned around, briefly, to hang my blazer on the back of my chair, and I saw him watching me. I looked up at him, and he didn’t turn away. I could hear the words from his mind just by looking at him.

“Why did you do this to us?” he said.

[Han Kyung’s POV]

I skipped classes today. I wasn’t in the mood to go to school since my mind was working overtime. Now that I’ve promised Sierra that we could be together, how was I going to make that happen? I’ve never brought her up in front of my father. He’d told me how he got rid of her. That was all he did. He told me… no explanations, no sympathy.

“She’s not the girl for you,” he said, and left it at that.

I was too stunned to react or do anything. When Sierra broke up with me, I was devastated and bewildered. I hadn’t seen it coming at all. A few weeks later, my father casually told me that he’d warned Sierra off, over dinner.

My instincts told me not to react immediately. My father obviously realized how much Sierra meant to me. He’d have expected me to blow up, but I decided to play it cool and just pretend it didn’t affect me that much.

“If you see her again,” he said, “I’ll ruin her whole family.”

“Araso…” was all I could say.

He would ruin her whole family… I’ve seen him do this before; mercilessly ruining the lives of those who opposed him or stood in his way. I wasn’t sure how I could change his mind, or how I could protect Sierra and her family from his wrath. My best bet at the time was to stay put, and bide my time.

The time is now…

My father had recently transferred the majority of his assets to me, much to the annoyance of the rest of the family. I’ve been put in charge of a larger territory, and I been overseeing the majority of the projects we’re working on. Now he has given me more responsibility, I was pretty sure that I had more bargaining power when it came to my life.

“Hyung?” Ryeo Wook looked at me questioningly.

“My father’s office,” I said, and he nodded.

I had to set it straight with my father today, or Sierra and I may never have a future together.

We arrived at my father’s office. As I walked in towards his room, the staff all stood up to greet me. Each and every one of them probably sneered at me behind my back since they knew I was an illegitimate child, but at the end of the day, I will get the last laugh since they’d all report to me and take my orders.

“Toryeonnim… the Chairman is receiving guests,” my father’s assistant greeted me as I approached his door.

“Who?” I asked her.

“A Chairman Lee and his daughter,” she said. “You should wait here.”

“I don’t like waiting out here,” I said. “I’ll join them.”

I opened the door and strode in before she could stop me. My father and his guests looked up at me, and my father smiled.

“Han Kyung,” he said. “Just the person we were looking for.”

“I wasn’t aware we had guests today, father,” I said, and bowed.

“I was going to invite them to dinner with us, but now we can just have lunch instead. Chairman Lee is a busy man.”

“Han Kyung… I have heard so much about you,” Chairman Lee beamed and offered to shake my hand.

“Really?” I smiled and shook his hand.

“This is my daughter, Eunice,” he said.

“Annyeong,” Eunice smiled.

She was slim and of average height, but I suppose you could classify her as pretty.

“Eunice will be relocating to Seoul, and I’ve recommended that she attend Dae Sang High since it’s near your school.”

“I’ll be depending on you to look out for my Eunice,” Chairman Lee said as he patted Eunice on the head.

“Appa!” she exclaimed, embarrassed by her father’s show of fatherly affection.

I began to take in the scene. What Sierra had predicted had come true. My father had found me a bride.

Music: TVXQ – All in Vain

Chapter 17: Where Do We Go From Here

[Sierra’s POV]

“I need to go,” I whispered as I pulled away from Han Kyung.

“Can we meet tomorrow?” he asked.

I nodded silently. I wasn’t in the position or mind to argue with him anymore. He had succeeded in breaking down the wall I had built to keep him out. If it wasn’t for Jae Wook, I’d have never met up with him again. I should have just stayed away.

My driver’s eyes widened when he saw Han Kyung walking me to the car. He’d not seen Han Kyung in a long time. Naturally, he was surprised.

“Call me when you get home,” he said as he leaned down, against the car door.

“Araso,” I replied, and he smiled and shut the door.

All the way home… his kiss replayed in my mind. I had sworn that I would not let him win me back, no matter what. So much was at stake if we were reunited. Now that I had failed, I didn’t know what to do. I was lost, and the responsibility I bore on my own now weighed on me mercilessly.

Music: TVXQ - Kissしたまま、さよなら

I kept my emotions inside throughout the car ride, not wanting to alarm my driver. I rushed out of the car as soon as it stopped and quickly let myself into the house. As soon as the door shut behind me, my tears started falling freely. I slumped to the ground, and sobbed. I’ve put myself in such a huge mess now. I have Jae Wook on one arm and Han Kyung holding on to my other. How would I explain the whole situation to Jae Wook? I have no more strength to push Han Kyung away, and yet I felt incredibly guilty towards Jae Wook, even if we’ve been together for less than a week.

“Sierra?” I heard a voice coming from the top of the stairs.

I looked up and through my blurry vision I could see Sang Hoon oppa running down the stairs.

“Oppa…” I sobbed, as he came to kneel down beside me.

“Kwaench’ana?” he asked me as he checked me, thinking I had hurt myself or something.

My brothers had this habit. Whenever I cried, they’d always this it’s because I was physically injured. Perhaps it was because I was such a klutz during my childhood, but now that I’m almost an adult, it seemed a little silly for them to still be checking me like that.

“Oppa…” I cried out and put my arms around his neck, burying my face in his shoulder.

“Sierra… odi ap’a? You have to tell me, or I can’t help you,” he said as he stroked my back.

“I don’t know what to do…” I sobbed.

“Do what?” he asked gently, still stroking me.

“Han Kyung,” I said.

“Why? Is he bothering you again?”

“I think… I think we’re back together,” I said.

“You think?” he said incredulously. “What do you mean you think?”

“I don’t know…” I started crying again.

“What’s wrong?” I heard Yong Min oppa’s voice.

“That Han Kyung’s at it again,” Sang Hoon oppa said.

“Again?”

“Bring her into the drawing room,” Yong Min oppa said as he walked towards the room and flipped on the lights.

“Come on,” Sang Hoon oppa said as he helped me to my feet.

Sang Hoon oppa sat me on the couch, then sat beside me. Yong Min oppa sat in an armchair.

“What happened Sierra?” Yong Min oppa asked, and I started to tell him the whole story.

Both my brothers knew how Han Kyung’s father had threatened me, and both had supported me when I decided to break up with him. Now that I had unwittingly got into contact with Han Kyung again, I wasn’t sure how my brothers would react.

“First of all,” Sang Hoon oppa said, “who do you love?”

“Me and Han Kyung,” I sighed. “We’ve been through so much together. It’s hard to push him out of my life.”

“But haven’t you been doing it for the past year?” Yong Min oppa said.

“I have, but only by pretending that he and I didn’t have a past. I made myself believe that we had nothing to do with each other, that we weren’t connected in any way.”

“And where does this new guy, Jae Wook, stand?” Yong Min oppa asked.

“I’m beginning to think that I should never have dragged him into this,” I said. “It was my mistake for trying to start a relationship with him.”

“He had a part in it too,” Sang Hoon oppa said. “Unless you were the one who seduced him,” he laughed, and I smacked him on the arm.

“Not funny…” I said.

“Mian…” Sang Hoon oppa smiled sheepishly.

“But I allowed him to invest his emotions on me,” I said.

“He was very willing to make that investment,” Yong Min oppa said. “So you needn’t feel guilty.”

“He’s taken so many hits for me,” I said.

“Han Kyung had him beat up?” Sang Hoon oppa asked.

“Twice,” I said.

“Oh my… you’re definitely indebted to him then,” Sang Hoon oppa laughed.

“How do you plan to explain yourself to Jae Wook?” Yong Min oppa asked.

“I don’t know…” I groaned and covered my face with my hands.

“You do plan to tell him, right?” Sang Hoon oppa asked.

“I don’t know…” I groaned again.

“You said you were back with Han Kyung, so don’t tell me you’re still going to stay with Jae Wook?” Yong Min oppa said.

“How can I tell him? After all he’s been through for me and after he’d sworn to protect me. How do I tell him?”

“He thinks he can protect you?” Sang Hoon oppa scoffed.

“Sierra… you have to make a decision. You can’t string them both along,” Yong Min oppa said.

“Wrong… she’s stringing one along. Han Kyung will have that poor kid bumped out of the scene entirely,” Sang Hoon oppa said.

“Don’t remind me…” I winced.

“Did he finally get his father’s blessing?” Sang Hoon oppa asked me.

“No… and that’s the problem.”

“Then why is he even bothering?” Sang Hoon oppa exclaimed. “Is he trying to get us killed too?”

“He said he’d get through to his father,” I said.

“Like hell he will,” Sang Hoon oppa said. “You’re not getting back with that Han Kyung. He’s gonna drag us all down to the pits with him.”

“But how do I get rid of him?” I asked. “I told him it wouldn’t work out, but he just wouldn’t listen.”

“Geez… what did you do to him, little sis?” Sang Hoon oppa asked. “You’ve totally possessed the guy.”

“I didn’t do anything. We just dated!” I said.

“Stop it, the two of you. We’ll need a plan,” Yong Min oppa said. “You’ll have to be firm, Sierra. I know you still like him, but he’s going to ruin our family if you stay together.”

“I know…” I said.

“Pretend nothing happened for now,” Yong Min oppa said.

“With whom? Han Kyung or Jae Wook?” I asked

“You’ll have to let Jae Wook go. He’s in danger as long as he stays by your side,” Yong Min oppa said.

“How am I going to tell him?” I asked.

“You just need to show him,” Sang Hoon oppa said, grimly.

[Jae Wook’s POV]

I woke up this morning and my body ached all over. Damn those thugs… they really got me good this time.

“Hyung…” Jae Joong called as he came into the room. “Feeling better?”

“Worse…” I coughed.

“Can you get to school?”

“Yea… I’ll be fine. Just some aches and bruises.”

“I need to go now,” Jae Joong said as he shrugged on his blazer. “Breakfast is on the table. I’ve put aside omma’s share. Just eat yours and leave it in the sink.”

“Araso… omma,” I smiled.

“Bye…” he said and left the house in a hurry.

I stood up slowly and went to the bathroom to wash my face. I checked out the bruise on my face, and smiled at the recollection of last night. I knew for certain that I was in for a bumpy ride, but I promised Sierra we’d stick together.

Sierra had some powers alright. She looks like a strong girl, but she still needs my protection, and I plan to do what I promised; protect her. The connection we shared yesterday was undeniable. I’d never felt the need to be with anyone before. I actually felt that I needed to be with her, I had to be with her. My life won’t be right without her.

I got ready for school and arrived just in time before the first bell. As I walked in, a car pulled up in front of the gate. It was a familiar black car. I jumped back when I saw Han Kyung step out of it. He smirked at me, and extended his hand to help the other passenger out.

It was Sierra.

Music: Tim - 내 안의 전쟁 (The War In My Mind)